I just stumbled on this really great article. Relevant excerpt:

"Then it hit me. All my gay male friends were out. Becoming close with gay men meant hearing their stories of coming out. That’s because coming out is a cathartic milestone in any out person’s life, and usually came after years of self-reproach, denial, and repression. Coming out meant finally forgiving themselves for being who they were and feeling how they felt. They tried denial, avoidance, hetero sex and guilt, then finally accepted themselves as themselves. Only when they let go of the blame and guilt could they love themselves. Despite familial and social anathema, they trusted themselves and refused to pretend to be something they were not. It was freeing to be one’s self. How simple, yet seemingly rare."