So, I had a lovely set of shabbos meals with Dionne and Chaim and their little toddler Itamar. And after Shabbos, I told Chaim that I'm gay when he called me on the phone: I finally had enough of him trying to set me up with girls. Which brings me to the topic of this rant: reactions to coming out of the closet. Or, rather, apparent lack thereof. I know, everyone wants to be the good supportive friend and no one wants to come off as a bigot, but really, I don't mind if you are at least a teensy bit flustered or something. Just take a second to say, "oh." Acknowledge the fact that I just said something kinda significant. Don't pretend that you're totally unsurprised when you were quite obviously working under the assumption that I was straight. It really is nicer for me that way.

You see, coming out to someone is always at least a little emotionally charged, because you can almost never be sure how the person on the receiving end of the news will react. A little part of me is bracing for the potential display of emotional fireworks. And when you manage to look totally unfazed by the words "I'm gay", that little part of me is still waiting for the other shoe to drop. It's thinking, "did you not hear me or something?" And it can't quite stop bracing itself. Plus, my perverse side is just plain disappointed by the lack of entertainment that would have been provided by a dramatic reaction.

I mean, it's not like I don't long for the day when a varying sexual orientation is no more stigmatized than an unusual ice cream preference. But let's not pretend we're there yet.