...but in a good way: Itai's latest journal entry articulates a lot of thoughts that I've had myself almost exactly. I've also given a lot of thought to the necessary criteria that my prospective mate must match, and I've also done the back-of-the-envelope calculations to realize how the slice of humanity that these criteria leave for me is vanishingly small. Now when I meet a person on my first try that successfully meets every important criterion, and who is also seeking the exact same improbable things in his mate, is it a merely some sort of analog to the anthropic principle at work, or is it a miracle?

The occurrence does seem a bit less shocking when you remember that finding a marriage partner is far from a purely random process. Humans aren't idealized gas molecules who only bump into each other by accident as they bounce around in a vacuum flask. By putting ourselves into the right situations, by filtering out all the wrong options so smoothly and swiftly and automatically, we raise the chances of success out of the abyss of the infinitesimal.

But this sort of reasoning does little to deflate my amazement at the synchronicity of me and Itai finding each other right after the first Rosh HaShanna/Yom Kippur in which I finally let my whole heart sing the prayer that it's been yearning but forbidden to sing since I first learned how to pray. It's powerful evidence that someone is listening.

In any case, I don't think anyone can deny that when you find the one-in-a-billion person that meets your impossible specifications (and who even makes you feel sweetness inside), you don't let go without making a tremedous effort to give it the chance to work.

You know, I hope Itai can handle when I get all Vulcan like this, because it's not such an infrequent event! :)

Yesterday, I was too tired from my adventures out of town and my late-night return to do anything much of note, besides sleeping late, working all day to catch up, and posting a new version of MoosicApplet from good old Paramjit. (Please don't ask me how to pronounce his name.)

Today, I wandered leisurely around town to shop for a few items: a new belt, a winter cap that isn't a lurid lime green color, and some speakers for the computer. Afterward, I went to visit Rebecca and Ashira for a few hours. I helped Becca install a blog onto her web site for recounting the adventures of Ashira, who only becomes more and more adorable everyday. It seems crazy that she's already rapidly approaching her first birthday.

In between the computer-puttering and the baby-playing, Becca sat me down for a serious talk about relationships. She's even more protective than she usually is both because I'm starting my first real relationship, and because she wanted to be sure that I was thinking about the practical ramifications of starting a family with someone so much older than me. However, it's still way too early in the relationship to really worry about a lot of the issues we talked about. At this stage, all I want to focus on is building the intense friendship with Itai that's needed as the foundation for any committed relationship to hold up in the long haul.

And to that end, I've started preparing for my Wednesday night date in Tel Aviv by packing up some fun and romantic videos with which to amuse ourselves. I can't wait!

My second date with Itai was deliciously comfortable. So much so that the first date seems practically wooden in comparison. We met at 3pm at Yaffo Gate of the Old City of Jerusalem. From there, I led the way to a little nook with flower-covered walls in the ruins on the way to the Kotel. On the way, I began a patchwork presentation of my life story. When we got to our destination, I continued talking while drawing a little picnic feastala from my backpack. We munched and chatted until the descending afternoon shadows caused the cold to creep up on us.

After repacking the food, we carried the conversation all the way to Seth's restaurant, since he had invited us to come over while he was still working so that he could treat us to dessert. I quite enjoyed introducing Seth and Itai to each other, letting Itai get a taste of the unique Pearson family dynamic. There was no shortage of interesting facts for us to exchange while we munched on french fries and the crunchy confection Seth sent us. (Pears poached in wine sauce, surrounding a scoop of sorbet, all atop a thick slab of granola cookie, for those of you keeping culinary score at home.) Seth kept dropping in and out until it was time for him to quit for the day, at which point the three of us walked most of the way back to Seth's apartment.

Itai and I took our leave from Seth before he got all the way home, and wended our way to Tmol Shilshom, seeing as we'd both enjoyed the atmosphere so much the last time. Obligatory joshing of me regarding tiramisu overdose ensued, and we shared a chocolate mousse. While we ate and talked and sipped our hot drinks, we were both amused by the boistrous antics of the adorable daughter of the family sitting at the table next to us. She had the most ridiculous eye-glasses: round coke-bottle lenses with gaudy pinkish-greenish plastic frames. It seemed like an appropriate background as Itai and I discussed the possibilities for children of our own, a topic that's obviously a favorite for both of us.

As the clock slid past nine, we gradually left the cafe and headed back to Seth's apartment so that I could pack up for my trip back to Tzfat. But before we did that, we stopped by briefly at Rachel's apartment to say good-bye to her and Seth. Not too long after that, we were on our way, strolling to the bus station where we would each take our separate ways home. My bus wouldn't arrive until at least 11pm, so we lingered happily together at the bus stop in the cool night air, exploring ever more wild and wonderful avenues of conversation. Suddenly, some young men who were also waiting for the bus to Tzfat broke out dancing and singing "Od Yishama." I grabbed Itai's arm and pulled ourselves into the little circle, asking the dancer to my right who was getting married. I wished a mazel tov to the young groom after he was pointed out, and after the singing circle broke up, I did not miss the bemused expression that had overtaken my date's face. I can tell that I'm going to have a lot of fun introducing him to a more intimate look at traditional Orthodox culture than he's been privvy to before. Late though the bus was, we were still reluctant to part. Our farewell took the form of a long, firm, warm hug with kisses on the cheeks. As I gazed at the moonlit landscape outside my bus window, the trees and rocks were filled with an uncanny richness of shape and color.

Now I have to endure a wait until Wednesday night before I get to see Itai again. The plan is that I will go to visit him at his apartment in Tel Aviv, and we'll move on afterward to spend Shabbos together in Tzfat.

Friday went by fast, split equally between working and picking up groceries from the shuk. It was a pleasure to get reacquainted with the intense liveliness of the Machaneh Yehuda market. As always, it reminded me of a scene from an Indiana Jones film, with merchants of all kinds hawking their wares at the top of their lungs. Rachel did the cooking, since Seth and I were working for most of the day.

Seth, Rachel, and I went to the Kotel for maariv, where we met up with Rachel's sister Jackie (sp?) and her boyfriend Eric. The Kotel was crowded as usual, but we found a nice minyan to sing along with. Dinner was a quiet affair, with just me, Seth, Rachel, and Rachel's kitten, Meeko. The chicken soup and baked chicken that Rachel had made were delicious and in overly abundant supply. Meeko provided most of the entertainment, though Rachel took the opportunity to squeeze me for a few details about my date with Itai.

In the morning, I went alone to Kol Rina for shacharis. I got to say hello to a lot of friends I hadn't seen in a while, and I lent an enthusiastic hand with the good old bikur cholim group singing at the nursing home after the kiddush. Singing on Shabbos for the old folks is probably the thing I miss most about Jerusalem.

Lunch was leftover chicken at Seth's friend Ilana's apartment with Seth, Rachel, Ilana, and Ilana's fiance Tzvi. The short afternoon was nibbled away with naps and reading on the couch. I tried to make some more progress on that Hebrew biography on Einstein, and I actually got through a few more pages.

I was pretty nervous at first. Having run out of ways to prepare for the date, I had nothing better to do than to show up at the restaurant at 6:45pm, fifteen minutes early. Even though I kept scanning in all directions for him, Itai came up and practically tapped me on the shoulder before I saw him. I greeted him with a smile and presented him with a small bunch of purple flowers I'd bought earlier in the day. Rachel (my brother Seth's girlfriend) thought the flowers were awfully sweet, but I think that sort of gesture might be something that's more appreciated by women than men.

I was still slightly nervous as we sat down to eat, and though our conversation apparently flowed perfectly fine, it still felt slightly stiff in an indefinable way. Soon enough, however, we both seemed to warm up and get more comfortable. When we finished eating and bentching, I took Itai to Tmol Shilshom for coffee. I was having a great time. We talked so much. I actually fell into my instinctive "listening mode" and let Itai do most of the talking, prompting him along and putting in my own two cents whenever I could. Itai's life seems so full of so many rich experiences that it's almost overwhelming. In the week before the date, I of course wondered whether the large age gap between the two of us would be an issue, but I didn't accurately imagine how I'd be slightly intimidated by his much greater level of experience. I'm confident that the silly illusion that I've done so little with my life will fade away after I've taken the time to talk more about myself and share more of my own life story.

As midnight approached, we walked together to the central bus station so that Itai could catch his bus back to Tel Aviv before it turned into a pumpkin. We arrived in what we thought was the nick of time, but we then discovered that the last bus had apparently left at 11:45pm, not midnight. Trying to figure out his options, I offered to find Itai a place to sleep at Seth's apartment, but I think that may have been too forward, since that kind of suggestion can be taken the wrong way. Anyway, Itai opted to ride home in one of the taxi-vans that continually loiter in front of the bus station. They're a bit pricey, but better than nothing in a pinch.

We've agreed to meet again on Sunday, but left the exact details up in the air. I think a picnic in the park would be the most fun. Or maybe a picnic in the Old City of Jerusalem would be better.

I think my biggest mistake of the night was getting the tiramisu at Tmol Shilshom. I had rather absent-mindedly forgotten that one of the key ingredients of that dessert is coffee, and the caffeine concentration was so high that I eventually started stuttering slightly and slipping into my old childhood lisp. Even worse was the caffeine hangover I woke up with this morning.

In conclusion, Itai lived up to my best expectations. He's compassionte, kind, intelligent, responsible, down-to-earth, and friendly. He loves and wants children of his own as much as I do, we share the same unconditional love for living in Israel, and we're both moving in the same direction religiously. In short, he seems to be exactly what I'm looking for in a husband. Let's see what develops!